How do you give gift money at celebrations?
In short
Good to knowNever hand over bare cash: put it in a special gift envelope and offer it with both hands. For weddings, new banknotes are usually used.
When does this apply?
For weddings and other celebrations, crisp new notes go into a shugi-bukuro envelope tied with red-and-white or gold-and-silver cords (mizuhiki). Condolence money (koden) for funerals goes in an envelope with black-and-white cords, and new notes are avoided.
Why?
New notes are said to show you prepared especially for the day. For funerals it is the opposite: new notes might suggest the death was expected.
What to do
- Use a celebration envelope (or a condolence envelope for funerals)
- Carry it wrapped in a cloth (fukusa) and hand it over with both hands at reception
- Ask people around you if unsure about the amount or envelope
Better to avoid
- Hand cash straight from your wallet
- Give amounts with 4 or 9 (many avoid them because they sound like "death" and "suffering")
Exceptions and differences
Typical amounts vary greatly with your relationship and the region. Some events, such as fixed-fee parties, do not need a gift, so check the invitation.
Manners can differ by region, facility and generation. Local signs and staff instructions come first.
Check with a quiz
How do you give gift money (shugi) at a wedding?
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Sources
- "Shūgi" and "Kōden": Money Gifts Expressing Congratulations or Condolences(opens in a new tab)
- Japanese Weddings: Practices and Pitfalls(opens in a new tab)
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